Tag Archives: Be positive

Dealing with jealousy

Oh well! So that’s quite a juicy topic and a very interesting one which is I feel is more of a hush-hush topic, for people know that it exists but they don’t want to admit it publicly, considering it might cause them some sort of an embarrassment or is going to tease their ego a bit and that’s the reason why they are busy silently combating with this one but here I am going to talk about it in a more umm, deeper manner or whatever you may call it.

I am pretty sure that all of us must have experienced jealousy at one stage or the other no matter how much we try to get away with it but I think walking through jealousy is only going to be a successful conquest if, we firstly accept and acknowledge that we have been at points, jealous in our life post which almost 70% of the job is already done. It’s absolutely normal, just a part of human mindset but is deeply rooted in fear and in lack and know that, the feeling of lack is rooted in ego.

Sometimes it is important for us to deeply analyse our emotions and go an extra mile to try and heal them cause unless we heal them, they are going to keep causing troubles for us, leading to absence of mental peace. So why not go into deeper insights and try and figure out how jealousy looks like. It is the general idea that can be taken from the help of sentences that people generally use;  I hate that she has those things, Why does she have them? I wish I had them. Why is he with her? I think I look much better than that girl. Look at me, my Life. I don’t have all these things. I don’t have this money. I don’t have a boyfriend. I don’t have xyz and the list would go on and on unless we choose to accept it and embrace ourselves and practice more and more self love and compassion. Might sound difficult at first, but is not impossible.

If somebody has something, we need to regard it as a blessing bestowed upon them. For the enormous amounts of hard work that they must have been upto all those years of their life, somewhat like the quote “Work hard in Silence and let your success make the noise”. We don’t know, we aren’t aware how incredibly hard circusmstances they would have endured, how many failures they had to overcome and when the time has come for them to enjoy the reward, the fruit of long years of toiling hard and struggles, what are we doing to them? Are we really being compassionate here? Are we really wishing them luck and positivity. Are we really being good human beings here?No, by being jealous and envious, we arez on top of it, trying to tarnish their success by throwing away negativity and jealousy is a negative vibe. Let’s accept it.

So try and make a smooth transition from jealousy to being inspired by that someone, to that extent, where you also want to work hard to earn that fruit and for that, know that, you would also have to put in the equal amount of hardwork, absorb in the pressure and only then you will be rewarded because if you want to chill in an air conditioned room, you would first have to know the experience of being burnt under the sun. Because, my dear, nothing in this world is ever free of cost. You have to endure some amount of “pain” in order to get some “gain” and notice that when you channelize your entire energy towards this process of trying to gain something, trying to work work hard and fulfill your dreams & desire post setting up goals and following your passion, you would find yourself engulfed in a bubble of positivity and there would just be no room for negativity and even if there are some other things which make you feel low and jealous and if the self doubt tends to creep in, don’t worry. Just soothe your inner child, comfort it and with a tranquil state of mind, affirm and say that I have been working hard and I am sure if I don’t give up right now, I will also get what I truly deserve. Also, be mindful enough to not say that “I will also get to match up with that someone”. That’s where comparison comes into play and this is what leads to jealousy. So remember, that as long as you hold love and compassion in your heart, nothing negative can impact you. I hope it helped.

How to manage bullies and take actions against bullying at educational institutions…..

Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school aged children that involves a real or perceived power imbalance. The behavior is repeated, or has the potential to be repeated, over time. Both kids who are bullied and who bully others may have serious, lasting problems. Bullying includes actions such as making threats, spreading rumors, attacking someone physically or verbally, and excluding someone from a group on purpose. In some way or the other almost everyone of us has undergone bullying. A major question to be asked is that, Due to what reasons do people bully?

Bullying is of various kinds such as verbal, social, and physical bullying. And now another dimension is added to the list called cyber bullying. Bullying can occur during or after school hours. While most reported bullying happens in the school building, a significant percentage also happens in places like on the playground or the bus. It can also happen travelling to or from school, in the youth’s neighborhood, or on the Internet.

Verbal Bullying:- It means writing and saying mean things about someone. It may include, teasing, name calling, inappropriate sexual comments, taunting, and threatening to cause harm.

Social Bullying:- It is also known as relational bullying, it means hurting someone’s reputation or relationships. It may include, leaving someone out on purpose, telling other children not to be friends with someone, spreading rumors about someone, and embarrassing someone in public.

Physical Bullying:- It means hurting a person’s body or possessions. It may include, hitting, kicking, pinching, spitting, tripping, pushing, taking or breaking someone’s things, and making mean or rude hand gestures.

Cyber Bullying:- It is bullying using electronic means. It is also know as online bullying. It has become increasingly common, especially among teenagers, as the digital sphere has expanded and technology has advanced.

Effects of Bullying:-

Bullying can affect everyone—those who are bullied, those who bully, and those who witness bullying. Bullying is linked to many negative outcomes including impacts on mental health, substance use, and suicide. It is important to talk to kids to determine whether bullying—or something else—is a concern. Kids who are bullied can experience negative physical, school, and mental health issues. Kids who are bullied are more likely to experience:

  • Depression and anxiety, increased feelings of sadness and loneliness, changes in sleep and eating patterns, and loss of interest in activities they used to enjoy. These issues may persist into adulthood.
  • Health complaints
  • Decreased academic achievement—GPA and standardized test scores—and school participation. They are more likely to miss, skip, or drop out of school.

A very small number of bullied children might retaliate through extremely violent measures. In 12 of 15 school shooting cases in the 1990s, the shooters had a history of being bullied.

How to manage Bullies:-

  1. Tell your parents or someone you trust about the bullying. Tell your parents the entire thing, they will surely help.
  2. Report bullying and victimization incidents to the school authorities or complain committee.
  3. Talk openly about bullying and don’t be afraid to speak up.
  4. Avoid bullies wherever you are and feel good about yourself.
  5. If someone is bullying you, don’t bully them back. Always stand tall and have composure.

How to take actions against Bullying:-

  1. Establishing an Internal Complains Committee (ICC) in every institution.
  2. Speaking up against bullying.
  3. Stay with people you trust. Avoid those places with higher risks.
  4. Getting help. Remaining quit will not help. Report as soon as possible.

Hence, bullying is wrong and will not stop. It is us who needs to stand strong against bullying, because those who judge will never understand, and those who understand will never judge.

Refrences:- http://www.stopbullying.gov