Are you still waiting for some last words of reason and explanations? Perhaps you were never really meant to get them ever. For if you think about it, what is closure really? Is it the memories left behind by those lilting words? Or is it the agony of those harsh words that you keep replaying over time in your own head?
Most people have someone in their lives with whom they lost contact over a period of time. Some goodbyes were intentional on both sides while many of them were aided with a sudden abruptness for no apparent reason at all. Or better still; some goodbyes were all out bitter. Yet somewhere in your mind, you might still be expectant on some form of communication regarding why.
Closure is a very funny thing; it has widely different meanings for different people. But at the end of the day, all someone wants is to feel some sort of resolution to a relationship. What will break your heart, although, is the fact that most people never get to really experience the closure that they want. And even if they do get closure, it will be in some unexpected form.
For some people, closure is having the person who wronged them admit to the said wrongdoing. As rarely as it happens, this will not help you reach a space of healing though.
For some, closure means the other person providing an explanation for his actions, right or wrong. The wronged party truly feels that this will help them move on in their lives and move past that one past experience.
Then there is another form of closure which is closure in the form of revenge. You wait to witness something bad happen to the person who wronged you or you take things in your hands and try to wreck their lives. This one is always empty. It will give you only a false sense of satisfaction because, in the end, you are still hurting. On top of that, you will most probably end up regretting your actions.
Closure is like the last chapter of a book, a book that you are writing. And whenever you finish a book, you move on to the new one. If you get stuck on that one book and just look back on the past, it will always leave you feeling salty. Instead, you could decide what you want as your own ending and move on with your life by resolving your issues.
Imagine what closure means to you. Is it an apology you are waiting for or something you wanted to say to the other person? If it is revenge, figure out why you need revenge instead of a revenge plot. Now write it down as a letter, rant all you want, and burn it.
When you are finally free of all you wanted to say or be said, figure out your future strategy. Focus on your life ahead. Whatever your need be for closure, the endgame remains moving on.
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